new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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