Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
where am i from again
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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