I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Ketchup is God's man juice
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
