Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
