Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
