Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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