I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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