I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
