i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
