When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize