Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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