I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
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They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
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We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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