arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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