Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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