and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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