I just cut my nipple shaving
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
