accomplished twins. life is a go
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
This toilet bowl is my home.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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