I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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