I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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