Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
