thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
