my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize