yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
