I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
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