But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
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