Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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