in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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