There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
