Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
