she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
