You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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