wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
