break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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