I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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