Will you blow on my dice?
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
