well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
