Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
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