I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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