do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
