I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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