thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
