Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
