yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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