The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
