That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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