I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I need a hoe opinion