Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
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REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
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I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.