Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Randomize
