Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
cat food counts as protein by the way
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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