There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
