i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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