dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
